RELATIONSHIP COUNSELING & TANTRA THERAPY  
RATE YOUR RELATIONSHIP
 

Sasha Lessin, Ph.D.
Lesson V RELATIONSHIP FITNESS TRAINING: Page 1of 4
CTA 101: CONSCIOUS LOVING RELATIONSHIP SKILLS


In this lesson, you first chart your own couple conduct and refine your relationship. Then you take a client-pair through the exercise.  Finally, in class, you share your experience with the fitness model.  

         The graph you create shows dynamics--interaction, emotion, expression, clarity (understanding) and contact (feeling of connection) in relationships. You (and then your client couple) rate these dynamics on a 1-5 scale. Based on your graph, you pledge behaviors that balance ratings on the five dynamics. (Balance, on the graphs, means interaction, feeling, expression, clarity and connection all rate 1s, 2s, 3s, 4s, or 5s.).  

Describe your dual dynamics--activity, feeling, expression, understanding and contact--on the following fitness graph. Your ratings will reveal routes to refine and enrich your relationship.

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INTERACT

     With your darling, discuss how much you make merry, break bread, do duties and dialogue. How often do you do things? How much time each day are you together?

Circle 1, 2, 3, 4 or 5 for activity.

5: intense. You interact on most days. You work, play, relax, and go places together.
4: strong. At least five times a week you eat, play, visit or have guests together.
3: moderate.
You do some things as a couple each week.
2: slight. You rarely romp, only doing things some weeks.
1: inactive. You usually go your separate ways.


Put a dot above the word "interaction" on the graph
above. Write the number (1,2,3,4 or 5) below the word, "interaction".

FEEL

Picture your partner. Review your reaction. How passionately do you feel affection, attraction, apprehension, anguish and anger back and forth between you?

 Rate your couple feeling. 
Measure emotion, not its expression. Choose one of these:

5: intense. You experience all the feelings toward each other.
4: strong. You feel deeply about each other.
3: moderate. You have some emotion for each other, but you restrict  feelings, some most of the time.
2: slight. You feel something for each other only occasionally.
1: indifferent. Why are you together?


Put a dot above "feeling" on the graph. Write the number below, "feeling".

EXPRESS

How do you emote? Do you yell, gesture, slam doors, write love notes, confront, cry, hug, kiss? Do you hush, withdraw, keep calm, stay secretive, avoid touch, or hide your feelings? Does the strength of what you show match the force of what you feel?

RC 20 -29  RELATIONSHIP COUNSELING

ACTIVE LISTENING PAGE 1 PAGE 2 PAGE 3
IMAGO MANAGEMENT PAGE 1 PAGE 2 PAGE 3 PAGE 4
UPLIFTING COMMUNICATIONS PAGE 1 PAGE 2 PAGE 3
CHOREOGRAPH & BONDING PAGE 1 PAGE 2 PAGE 3 PAGE 4 PAGE 5
RELATIONSHIP FITNESS TRAINING PAGE 1 PAGE 2 PAGE 3 PAGE 4
CONSCIOUS LOVEMAKING PAGE 1 PAGE 2 PAGE 3 PAGE 4 PAGE 5 PAGE 6

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