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Learn the cybernetic model. The cybernetic model of mutually-enhancing communication between lovers is a feedback model. The basic idea is that honest communication improves relationships. When you confront your lover or friend and take to heart what he or she says, you help each other grow. You feel loved and make your choices based on love. You accept, adore, cooperate and share more. The more you share, the more you develop judgment, competence and individuality and actively show these to your beloved, who lovingly yet honestly shares reactions. Use this feedback to raise your consciousness so you perceive with greater clarity, develop your individuality further and make better choices. The key to growth in this model: commit to someone whom you accept, a lover or friend who lovingly challenges and who enhances you. Challenge is critical; in the heat of intense, authentic emotional confrontation you give each other the feedback each of you needs to understand how you affect each other, the feedback you need to become a more loving person. You risk your vulnerability with the lover you commit to--she or he could reject or accept you and your growth. You stop seeing things only your way and open to your mate’s opinions. You care about her or his development. Learn from each other, cooperate, and make ever-more growth-enhancing choices, based on the loving energy you share. Embrace the cycle with your lover and raise your sophistication as you learn from her or his experience and feedback. Your growth simultaneously contributes to your beloved’s growth. As you mature from her or his feedback, you can give the greater love, acceptance, cooperation and feedback she or he needs. Each time you both complete a cycle--choice, commitment, vulnerability, encouragement, synergistic learning and use of each other's reactions--you raise your consciousness. |
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See: CERTIFIED TANTRA ASSISTANT PROGRAM TANTRA SCHOOL BEGINS JANUARY 25, 2001 - School is held monthly for 10 days thru 2002 |
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