|
Take turns reading with a partner. One of you read the
directions aloud. When
you see ***, let your partner talk.
Lie on your back. Relax. [Give her or him time] Put my left
hand on your heart,
my right on your genitals and put your hands atop mine.
Close your eyes. [Take
three deep breaths, imagine sending energy into his heart
through your right
hand, receiving it through your left.] Ok, let's gently
release our hands; lower
them.
Feel your genitals--your sexual chakra; notice your heart,
your love chakra.
Reconsider your lovers from days gone. Say their names. ***
For each lover who was important to you,
a) Say when--the approximate YEARS--you were involved. Say
how old you were, ***
b) Say WHERE you were when you related to her, the key
EVENTS in your
relationship ***
c) Tell me your EMOTIONAL AND SEXUAL SHARING with each. ***
d) Tell the DEVELOPMENTAL TASKS YOU COMPLETED with each. ***
e) Summarize the events, sexual and emotional sharing and
the developmental
tasks we've experienced together. ***
f ) Imagine [Lover 1: Say the name] is before you. To this
lover,
express your LONGINGS, what you wished you could have
shared. ***
g) Express WITHHELD FEELINGS, things you didn't get to
say.***
h) Say what you RESENT. ***
I) Assert your DEMANDS, what you really wanted. ***
j) Say your APPRECIATIONS ***
k) Tell what you REGRET. Complete: "I forgive you for ..."
***
l) Tell [Lover 1: Say name] WHAT YOU LEARNED from being
together.
***
m) FORGIVE YOURSELF aloud for not doing better. ***
n) Bid this lover FAREWELL. ***
o) How, if you had it to do over, would you DO BETTER in the
relationship with
[Lover 1]? ***
How can you apply that improvement to your relationship with
me/(or your current
or next lover)? ***
REPEAT THE PROCEDURE FOR EACH SIGNIFICANT LOVE
***
* Based on
Hendrix, H., 1988, Getting The Love You Want, NY: Harper,
1991,
Getting The Love You Want: A Couples' Workshop, NY:
Institute for Relationship Therapy
Lessin, A., 1991, Great Relations, Wailuku: School of
Counseling,
Stone, H., 1991, Psychology of Selves--Group Exercises;
Stone, H., Winkleman
S., 1989, Embracing Each Other, page 36, San Rafael: New
World Library.
sashalessinphd@aol.com
http://www.schooloftantra.com
|
World Polyamory Association 
